I was privileged to see this light hearted introductory skit highlighting the importance of the Leading With Care policy at Oakridges Presbyterian Church in London Ontario. Thank you to the author, Rev. Jane Swatridge, for allowing us to post this resource and giving permission to other congregations for it’s use. ~Tori Smit
Leading With Care: On Gilligan’s Island
It is now time for our Leading with Care presentation, and I’m sure it’s like nothing you’ve ever seen before!
But please understand that although we may have a little fun with the policy today, the message is important for the continued safety of our church family and those we serve. Watch and learn, and enjoy!
Leading With Care: On Gilligan’s Island
(Play the “Gilligan’s Island’ theme song. Gilligan & the Skipper appear at top of verse 2; rest of cast appear at, “five passengers set sail that day …” Pantomime the storm at verse 3, “The weather started getting rough …”, mimicking being tossed around on stage, etc. Then cast members step forward, acknowledge crowd as their character is mentioned.)
(After the song ends the pantomime continues with the Howell’s ‘chat’ quietly with each other counting their money; Gilligan, Mary Ann & Ginger ‘chat’ excitedly as Gilligan picks up picnic basket; Professor notices something on the ground, bends to examine; Skipper notices Prof’s actions, then turns to Gilligan]
Skipper: What are you up to, little buddy?
Gilligan: The girls & I are going on a picnic to the other side of the island.
Mary Ann: I’ve packed us nuts, and fruit, and I made my famous coconut cream pie!
Ginger: And I’m the scenery.
Prof: I’m not sure that’s a good idea.
Thurston: But she’s always the scenery. (Lovey glares) Sorry Lovey, here (hands her some money).
Prof: No, I’m referring to these prints I’ve found here in the sand.
Skipper: What is it, Professor?
Lovey: Looks perfectly harmless to me.
Prof: Why, Mrs. Howell, don’t you realize what this means?
(everyone reacts, looks stunned, confused, shrug shoulders, etc.)
Prof: Why, judging from the unusual size and shocking depth of these footprints, and the apparent direction and pace of perambulation, before you can go picnicking anywhere, you’d better prepare a (look to audience) RISK ASSESSMENT.
(Mary Ann cowers beside Gilligan, Ginger cowers beside Skipper, Thurston cowers beside Lovey for protection)
Gilligan: Do you mean, Professor, that we can’t just do whatever we want …
Mary Ann: whenever we want …
Ginger: with whomever we want …
Lovey: without completing one of these? (brings Risk Assessment form out of purse) Well, that’s ridiculous!
Prof: Mrs. Howell, that’s precisely what I mean.
Thurston: Now look here, my good man. I’m Thurston Howell the Third, and I don’t fill in any forms. I have people to do that.
Prof: Mr. Howell, if you want to stay safe, I’m afraid you’ll have to. Why, all our lives may depend on it.
(Thurston harrumphs indignantly)
Lovey: Oh there there, maybe you can pay someone to do the form for you.
Gilligan: Do we all have to fill them out?
Mary Ann: For everything we do around here?
Ginger: What do you consider, risky, Professor?
Lovey: My yes, are we safe here?!
Prof: Absolutely. But we must understand that certain activities involve RISK.
Skipper: Well, like what sorts of things, Professor?
Mary Ann: Oh, how can a friendly picnic possibly have any risk?
Ginger: Come on, Professor, just one teensy, weensy little picnic?
Thurston (to Lovey): Where in the blazes were the tickets on sale for this picnic?
Lovey: We almost went down in a storm on the Thames, and he’s worried about a picnic!
Gilligan: Yah, she’s right – Skipper, whatever happened to the pre-tour Risk Assessment?
Skipper: Well, I thought YOU did one…
Gilligan: … I didn’t do one – I thought YOU were going to do one …
Skipper: No, little buddy, YOU were supposed to do one …
Gilligan: Uh-uh, I’m not trained on the paperwork, YOU were supposed to do one …
(they keep arguing until cut off by Thurston)
Thurston: I KNEW we should have just bought our own boat & crew!
Mary Ann: Well, it’s not Gilligan’s fault if he wasn’t properly trained.
Ginger: Ooo, training is everything. I mean, that’s the difference between a Golden Globe … and an Oscar!
Prof: There are important things to consider in every case. Mary Ann, do you know for certain that those nuts and fruits are safe for everyone to eat? I mean, did you check for allergies?
Mary Ann: Well, no, but I’m sure we’d find out one way or another.
Prof: And what about food preparation? Did you wash your hands, and ascertain that the utensils & working area were clean?
Mary Ann: I brushed off the sand as best I could. Back home in Kansas, we just wipe our hands on our pants.
(Howell’s & Ginger turn up noses/cringe; men just nod in agreement, ‘oh yah, that works’, etc.)
Prof: And Ginger, were you really planning on hiking to the other side of the island in that gown, with those shoes?
Ginger: What’s the problem? They match.
Gilligan: Well, you do look like an Incident Report ready to happen.
Skipper: Good thinking, little buddy.
Prof: And Gilligan, as the leader of the picnic group, have you considered the appropriate ratios of leader to number of those in your party? What about your Criminal Record Check? We haven’t checked all your references yet. And what about the vulnerability of those you’re caring for?
Gilligan: They look pretty sturdy to me.
Thurston: On second thought, think I’ll go back to our cabin and lock the door. Coming, Lovey?
Lovey: Oh you’re not worried, are you dear?
Prof: As long as we’re prepared, and we’ve considered all the risks, we’re perfectly free to proceed with virtually any plan.
Ginger: You mean, like a quiet, scenic picnic.
Mary Ann: Or sharing a meal together.
Gilligan: Or a simple little hike in a ball gown.
Skipper: Not quite, little buddy.
Prof: But about these footprints. We’re obviously not alone on the island (everyone looks around, wide-eyed, scared & suspicious). Ladies, you stay here. Mr. Howell, you come with me and we’ll conduct a reconnaissance mission.
Skipper: And Gilligan, you come with me and we’ll conduct a reconnaissance mission.
Gilligan: Ok, but I really think we oughta scout around a bit first.
(girls exit stage right, Prof. & Thurston exit stage left; Skipper & Gilligan exit stage right)
Voiceover: Sadly, they remained on the island, marooned there forever. What a positive difference it would have made had they invested in training and planned ahead appropriately for the tour. Oh well …
Theme Song resumes